I DON’T KNOW HOW BIG HER MUG IS

30 July 2007
HOT & HUMID Monday (39 Degree Celsius)
Late Afternoon @ 1800 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: Santa Monica By Savage Garden
Mood: *LOBO MY ASS!*

Nothing spectacular happened. Still running around like monkey…

My assumption seems to be getting bad to worst, I thought going to ORD should be quite lobo… As of now, I am off the prediction by one mile. For better or for worst, let me just finished it in good time and in a good taste (haha).

Let’s enjoy this song, for a change, it is in English.

Santa Monica by Savage Garden

In Santa Monica in the winter time
The lazy streets so undemanding
I walk into the crowd
In Santa Monica you get your coffee from
The coolest places on the promenade
Where people dress just so
Beauty so unavoidable
Everywhere you turn, it’s there
I sit and wonder what am I doing here?
But on the telephone line I am anyone
I am anything I want to be
I could be a supermodel or Norman Mailer
And you wouldn't know the difference
Or would you?
In Santa Monica, all the people got
Modern names, like Jake or Mandy
And modern bodies too
In Santa Monica, on the boulevard,
You'll have to dodge those in-line skaters
Or they'll knock you down
I never felt so lonely,
Never felt so out of place
I never wanted something more than this
But on the telephone line I am anyone
I am anything I want to be
I could be a supermodel or Norman Mailer
And you wouldn't know the difference
On the telephone line, I am any height
I am any age I want to be
I could be a caped crusader, or space invader
And you would know the difference
Or would you?

TRY SAYING I LOVE A CHALLENGE INSTEAD OF MORE FUCKING SHIT TO DO

27 July 2007
HOT HOT SUPER HOT Friday (39 Degree Celsius)
Night @ 1950 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 爱一个人好难 by 苏永康
Mood: *Oh Yes, A Cow*

I’m Super tired.

This week running around like monkey, heck even pay also in peanuts. But it is ok, cos I am the Willingly Fucked; all for the sake of a couple more peanuts (out of sympathy I supposed from the Cheebye Company). Not to say they are fucking terrible (they are by the way) but just just…

Oh I also helped colleague move house, TWICE effort somemore, oversee some renovation works and had a midnight session of karaoke in between these. Man, this morning really thought of NOT going to work, can hardly lift my cigarette but a bird got to do what a bird got to do… And that is? Go to work. Anyway, it is still ok, cos I am the Willingly Fucked. There is a different you know, but we will leave that to another day. For argumentative sake, let’s just say, for whatever happening in life, there is a reason for everything under the sun. Err…

Anyway, I left before lunch, had the Chinese Cheap Buffet (again), certified some deliveries and move house (the second effort). Today was particularly bad cos

1. The day temperature soars to 39 Degree, Very Hot & Humid somemore
2. I had little sleep the night before
3. And of course, I am mentally and physically drained since Wednesday (my first effort).

I sound incoherent now, that is because I am really tired, seriously.

Man, I must sleep now.

Have Fun

爱一个人好难 by 苏永康

你说你还是喜欢孤单, 其实你怕被我看穿
你怕属于我们的船, 飘飘荡荡靠不了岸

时到如今没有答案, 我的真心为你牵荡
不管相见的夜多么难堪, 渐渐淡淡的说, 爱是不爱

想要把你忘记真的好难, 思念的痛在我心里纠缠
朝朝暮暮的期盼, 永远没有答案, 为何当初你选择一刀两段

听你说声爱我真的好难, 曾经说过的话风吹云散
站在天平的两端, 一样的为难
唯一的答案, 爱一个人好难

爱恨消失前, 用手温暖我的脸, 为我证明我曾真心爱过你

25 July 2007
Wednesday (27 Degree Celsius)
Night @ 2220 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 等爱降落 by 李玟
Mood: *One of those Days*

A while earlier I was reading an email from my buddy, stating that he will be ROM-ing soon. Together with his new confirmation, I will be attending a grand total of 3 ROMS and 6 Weddings within a span of one year. That is like an average of 1 every other month, not withstanding any last minute invites.

Just now while smoking and trying to clear my head, I suddenly came to a realization that I am the only bachelor guy left in my group of close friends and relatives, save of course by Mr Ong & Mr Nyo (but we rarely hang out so they don’t count).

Am I sad? Should I be sad? Well, just another day I supposed. It is but a sad fact of life, my life.

What can be so difficult; finding someone, falling in love together and live happily ever after. Of course, being an optimist, I have to bear the pain of rarely believing in Ever After. Even with the odds, I would still say 60-40, in favor of staying together (like my dear parents) but don’t quote me.

And such realization has to dawn upon me while I am smoking. Whoever says smoking is bad for health really deserve a medal, YES, it is bad for fucking brains too.

How now? I am destined to spend my life in eternal loneliness or more appropriately, alone. Who can I blame but myself; my very own selfish, grumpy, bastardly, cheebye self.

And then I realised that I do have faith, faith in myself, faith that I would one day meet someone who would be sure that I was the one™

Bull shitting myself with such powerful phases never feels so good.

等爱降落 by 李玟

蓝色橘色紫色满城霓虹, 点缀荒凉的夜空
背影越拉越远的你我, 祝福凝结空气中

几年几月几天几个秋冬, 越算越让人失落
你的地址从此是自由, 你说你不愿再回头

我静静的想想你的脆弱, 也想你温柔的笑容
是什么伤痛让你变好多, 俩个人什么不能说
我在街头你在天空泪水各自汹涌

当飞机在某个地方降落, 这份情也失去联络
爱是钥匙恨是枷锁请对自己宽容
当你的心愿意重新降落, 我会守在这片土地等候

No Choice lah, wait until the cow go home, procreate, a few generations down the line, die, composed, recomposed, compressed and become oil later, I will still be waiting.

爱恨消失前, 用手温暖我的脸, 为我证明我曾真心爱过你

I will still be waiting… … ….

SAVE THE CHEERLEADER, SAVE THE WORLD

25 July 2007
Nice Wednesday (29 Degree Celsius)
Evening @ 1839 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 可惜你不在 by 戴爱玲 (Oh I fricking Love this Song)
Mood: *Shoot, I kill Bird!*

Yup, boring old me, instead of doing something productive, I actually sat through the entire season of Heroes (by NBC). Not bad actually, storyline is refreshing and the taglines are funnily Duh-ish at times; like this; Save the Cheerleader, save the World. But trust me; it is a nice show, made especially for those long lonely nights haha. Anyway, some of the characters are pretty forgettable save for the cheerleader, but of course. She is quite cute (score 1) and pretty (score again) but her power a bit scary (minus). She has this thing call spontaneous regenerative ability, in simple term, she can never be injured. Also, she has to crash and burn herself on purpose to prove the point, man, I give it to her, if I am her testing out the ability at that rate, it will be a miracle I don’t die of heart failure.

But I still prefer the villain (Sylar), who of all things able to gather all these suckers’ power by devouring their brains.

******Silence******

Err, I think I am better off sticking to my salad.

On that note, I had a very authentic Japanese Cuisine last afternoon; price slightly exquisite but worth every penny. Seriously, for a non-fish guy, I actually enjoy the grilled fish, where it literally melts in your mouth. The only complain? Portion too small lah, Bird is a growing bird, how to keep full man?

You see, whenever I am in office, it is always the same-old-boring-looking-at-my-toes-trying-to-make-it-laugh. It is only when we decide to lobo for One, just one fricking day that we have basically proven every aspects of Murphy’s law. Basket, someone called while we were helping a colleague to move house and demand (BIG WORD) that we go back to answer some fricking questions. But he is known for his Kan Jiong Spider type, so we decided to play cool and send an email instead, haha. What else can we do? We die die also NOT going back just to satisfy his curiosity, beside he got so many staffers, why can’t he just arrow one of them to find the facts? He purposely one, always think we fucking lobo. Basket, I lobo, idle fuck also got better sense than going back to office for that 15 minute of (his) fame.

Oh Oh, I am left with one more Hard Rock Café Pilsner (from Baltimore) and I would have all the glasses from my places of visit. Well, getting nostalgic again, drown by memories of bitter, sweet and plain old depression. On one hand, I dread going back to the same old island, meeting the same old fuckers and having to run the rat race all over again. Comparatively, it is that kind of lifestyle that beckons my dreadfulness.

Personally, I would call a place a home when it gives a sense of belonging and living without any apprehension of being judged. Like I mentioned elsewhere in my blog, no one would bate an eyelid for things you might be inclined to do in here. Maybe they are too courteous, maybe it is their preference for individualism, either way, it works for me.

Going home, ah, it has a nice warming tinge to it, doesn’t it? I wish I could say that when I arrived in a couple of months time. Not that my home country is a terrible place, chances are, if you are a tourist (yup a tourist), you would simply fall in love with it, temporarily, give and take 2 months (max). I have been back a couple of times since 2004, I have come to realisation of one constant, the universal, and the only truth; When we leave a place, our memories just stop at that point in time. And we remembered it as it is, nothing else. Every return brought a sense of tourists’ familiarity; somehow, somewhere I have seen this before, it look familiar but just couldn’t tell what’s right about it though.

My memory stops at 2004.

YOU SAY YOU LIKE HIM BECAUSE OF WHAT? HANDSOME & GENTLEMENLY? RIGHT, HANDSOME MY ASS! GENTLEMEN KEE LAN!

23July 2007
HOT Monday (33 Degree Celsius)
Night @ 2159 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 我不是爱过就算的人by 苏永康
Mood: *Right, OF cos he is Handsome*

Today went for the Chinese buffet again. Man, I drove 45 min just to eat highly salted, don’t-know-ingredient-get-from-where-one-yet-so-tasty stuffs. You have to give it to the Chinese, they are damn solid. Can have many varieties of food and yet charges so cheap (relatively speaking, considering my usual lunch cost S$20 bucks at least). Seriously, at this point in time, I don’t care where they buy their food from, since

1. ½ of all vegetables, a quarter of seafood, 90% of everything you see, hear and touch and almost all toys (save for Lego) in US are made in China.
2. They are cheap and usually good, save for some teeny weenie recalls here and there
3. Read above

It is a never ending cycle, not that vicious but cruel nevertheless. Humans just don’t understand, China problem is the world problem, as the Harvard Business review says it so aptly about pollution “We (US) did not reduce our pollution, we just outsource it to China”. See my point?

On a lighter note, We decided to pop over to my boss’s place to check on the renovation after lunch. It was ok in the beginning but slowly, as I emerged from my heavy-tummy syndrome, lo and behold! To my horror of horror, something so blatantly obvious and yet Bird really cocked eye until so jia lat. I just discover that I forgot to water my boss’s precious lawn. Wau liew, and the temperature these days are at high 30s. Cow, no wonder I see the grass all like kind of patched. Damn, did a water quickie and tomorrow, when I have more time, I shall really drown them fuckers in water. Cheebye lah, no one reminded me, all go there see house eyes all shoot bird. Heng man, according to a colleague who happened to be a qualify botanist, she says grass very hardy one, not so easy die cock stand. I believe her (the fact that she is pretty has no part at this point in time), I really do…

Oh yes, must say really compliment Mr Nyo’s very chim-tology description of my blog. A simple account such as “a cow peh blog” can say it all but noo.. its not enough apparently. He makes it sound so… err, how you put it in English again, Intellectual?

Mr Fashionable and his expletive-ridden, angsty, witty and (mostly) beautiful discourses about things desirable and things not so desirable, dotted with vivid accounts of his daily occupational struggles, unrequited love, disordered belongings and other routine daily challenges faced by a mortal in mundane existence.

See, that’s why I like befriending intelligent beings.

我不是爱过就算的人 by 苏永康

点不燃你心中那盏灯, 就在大风的夜我等了又等
悬空的心总在星光中翻滚, 坠落一杯满满情真

忘不了梦里轻轻一吻, 就在热闹的街我向前狂奔
期盼的眼终于溢出了泪痕, 装满一碗浓浓情深

我不是一个爱过就算的人, 爱过的每一刹那都是我永恒
哪怕风愈吹愈冷, 哪怕爱情有伤痕
你还是我最思念的人

我不是一个爱过就算的人, 只希望有个诚恳无悔的过程
哪怕你永远不能, 就算我孤注一生
也不介意在你眼眸里自焚

WE LOVE VEGETARIAN, MORE MEAT FOR US

22 July 2007
Argh its Sunday (31 Degree Celsius)
Afternoon @ 1700 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 可惜你不在 by 戴爱玲
Mood: *ARGGGGHHH*

@ 0945 – Wau liew eh, I have to move out all my big boxes, relabelled them and stack them up again. Cheebye, it is like 30 of them… COW!!! The mere sight of them is enough to make my leg wobbly already… Argh, it is time like this that I would love to have a clone. Hmmm… This is a classic example of Lack of Planning on my part, which has constituted an emergency to my own grave digging. FUCK…. But a bird got to do what a bird got to do, Cow peh so much also must do it…

@ 1110 – Argh, My Back… Oh that’s going to hurt in the morning… confirm!

@ 1206 – Funny, I don’t even feel like smoking… which is a Good/Bad News, depending on your take.

@ 1310 – Lunch time… Managed to use my reserve energy to cook something edible. I am not that fussy eater, anything that taste vaguely ok is good enough for my stomach.

@1400 – Cow, Just down a can of Coke… Man, that feel really good

@ 1550 – Enough liao, I cannot go on anymore… Seriously, I am dead SHACK out.

@1655 – After a good cold shower and one tub of Haagen Dazs Ice cream, I feel much better. Yup, I finish a whole ½ pint of it, hopefully I don’t feel sick after that… Man, lucky for the can of coke, if not, sure damn shack, long live the Caffeine. For your general knowledge, no one has so far died from Caffeine overdosed before but for fuck sake, don’t be the first. This type of honour better leave it to some punk.

Before I end the message for the day, got this from a Porn Entry I read earlier; You will lose your life downloading, its too much, really. Now, why anyone would wants to download everything… And to such an extent that warrant a Warning? That reminds me, My laptop kinda slow now… haha

Oh yes, Mrs Kwek has Tagged me to save the bears… Read somewhere long time ago that these bears are immobilised for their bile extraction. I don’t know about you, but that is seriously painful and I am pretty sure I wouldn’t want a stick up any part of my body. So do your part and save a bear lah.

TAG:

Miss Teo Seth & Sara
Mr Elvis and GF
Ms Peanutz (if she ever read this…)
IGuiying

PS: Dang, New Boss coming over next Monday, no more lobo days liao…

真的可惜你不在

20 July 2007
Lonely Friday (25 Degree Celsius)
Night @ 2359 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 可惜你不在 by 戴爱玲
Mood: *I am lonely*

Just feeling a little lonely on a Friday night.

Nothing much perhaps

And then I realised that I do have faith, faith in myself, faith that I would one day meet someone who would be sure that I was the one

或许我注定就这样过了一生…可是真的可惜你不在我旁边

I miss you so much… Why..? When I don't even know who are you...

可惜你不在 by 戴爱玲

这一次我要把长发弄乱, 反正天再冷, 躲不进你的胸怀
推开了你的手, 泪流满腮不怕你嘲弄, 不怕你冷漠
此刻只想要耍赖

这一夜最好先说出good bye
戏拖得太久, 傻女生也会学乖
喝不下这杯酒, 苦涩来得好快
让你去作梦, 让你去摸索
让你与我无关

我爱我盼只可惜你不在
我爱上的从来只是幻影
从不存在

我爱我盼只可惜你不在
说好彼此要真心对待
说过的话变成了负债
不能向你讨的爱
我怎能锁在心上

说好彼此要真心对待
已经证明撞上了冰山
不能为你留的爱
我最好忘得痛快

IF I PROMISE NOT TO KILL YOU, CAN I HAVE A HUG?

20 July 2007
Lovely Friday (25 Degree Celsius)
Night @ 2240 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 人质by 张惠妹
Mood: *I Hate you!*

Today a little under the weather. Had a bloated feeling and generally feeling kind of sick. Drats.

I think it started last evening…

I lost a pint of blood during my routine jogging on wussy treadmill. You see, I was overwhelmed by this Japanese lady beside me for a good 20 min and the thing is, I can’t help but to notice her … errm body. Man, she really got assets; top heavy, tummy slim and butt cute. She is kind of tall but that’s beside the point.

She knew she is the center of attraction, who can blame her, I every week go gym also never see such a beauty before. All the rest are either Obasan or err, never mind. Wau liew, and her attire also very teasing; orange sports bra and white tights; showing her toned naked midriff, oh man, WHITE tights! It’s a miracle I survive the ordeal … haha.

Did I mention she smell nice too? Man, I really becoming one of those dirty old man… haha

But seriously, I think it was the bottle of red. I have been having one glass every night since long time ago and nothing major happened. Maybe last night was a little overly excited by the lady, and down my red a little too fast, haha. Whatever…

On a side note, the weather is lovely, in the early 20s.

Anyway, beside the weather, I got a little shock from my Amazon purchase. An unbreakable Corelle plate was shatter beyond recognition during shipping. After getting over the initial disbelief and started writing in a complaint, I got a replacement immediately. There are good customer services and there are BAD customer services. Its all boils down to luck. But how can an unbreakable plate be shattered to a million pieces? Ah, your guess is as good as mine.

And on a bitter note, I do hate you for making me feel like shit. But assuredly I say to you, you will pay for your insolence and disrespect for me. Never mind that it was me who allow your ill-treatment to rub in on me real hard. And trust me on this, YOU WILL PAY FOR IT, DEARLY. Muahahah

人质by 张惠妹

我和你啊存在一种危险关系
彼此挟持这另一部份的自己
本以为这完整了爱的定义
那就乖乖的守护着你

相爱变成猜忌怀疑的烂游戏
规则是要憋着呼吸越靠越近
但你的温柔是我唯一沉溺
你是爱我的就不怕有缝隙

在我心上用力的开一枪
让一切归零在这声巨响
如果爱是说什么都不能放
我不挣扎反正我也没差

人质在这一刻得到释放
相爱的纯粹落得如此下场
你满意吗我们都别说谎

SUDDENLY MY SKIES DARKENED SOMEMORE

19 July 2007
Humid Thursday (30 Degree Celsius)
Evening @ 2110 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 我多么羡慕你 by 江美琪
Mood: *There You be*

Thought you might want to know… I found my first and only love in Friendster recently.

Yup, she is happily married (from those Friendster pictures, she does look happy) and yes, to a very decent church-going type guy. Good for her, at least he is in every aspect, much better than say, Bird. I mean, I am secular, with no intention of going anywhere religious and beside, I don’t think I made the best husband/father type.

She needs someone whom she can relate to. Someone who could offer her the best of his life and perhaps spending eternity with, that’s heaven in case you ask. Those traits are most certainly not found in Bird.

Anyway, that is all in the past. But if she does come back to me, I will definitely not welcome her back with my arms wide open. I am stupid,yes, a little cheapskate etc etc (big Yes), but then I also have this thing call pride. She’s not the prettiest girl I know, heck she’s not even young (same age as bird but that’s another story), knowing that I am a sucker for sweet young things. Who knows, things might turn out quite differently if we are together, that I am afraid, we will never know.

Seeing her pictures again, even after all these years, still make me a little sad. I wonder why… Perhaps that is what human known as forsaken love. No matter how hard and terrible it had done to me, I still misses her. How long it has been already? 8 years? Sometime it is not the passing of time that matters but those few moments that caught my breath. I wouldn’t say we parted on a good note but that is something I need to come to terms with and move on.

Whoever cares right? I do, but that’s life and guess what? I've move on

我多么羡慕你 by 江美琪

有时候风太急, 禁不住挂念起你
这一刻离我遥远飞行

有时候夜太静, 拦不住回忆的心
于是泪, 每个夜里如繁星

我多么羡慕你, 总可以转身飞远远的
我的爱是你沉重行李, 绊住你追新梦的决心

我多么想念你, 当时间都失去了意义
穿越思念后等成信箱
让你需要的时候可以投递
告诉我沿途中想与我分享的心情

TRY SAYING I DON’T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND INSTEAD OF SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS

18 July 2007
Humid Wednesday (33 Degree Celsius)
Afternoon @ 1400 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 人质by 张惠妹
Mood: *Oh Man*

Cow, today is another HOT & Humid day. I was driving along the main street and my legs nearly burnt out by the Sun. Even with my shades, I can hardly see around, with all the glares and reflections.

Morning spent overseeing some renovation works, later picks some building materials and had a sumptuous Brazilian lunch. It was my first Brazilian cuisine and it taste rather, how you put it in English; Meaty? Yup, every chunk, every cutting (like those you find in Middle Eastern Kebab) contains meat meat and more meat. No wonder my friend told me to go really hungry.

On a separate note, I received 2 links today, both of which seem to confirm my theory on Human; they are both equally sick and funny at any given time.

First Link: Some punk place a big goldfish in a tank full of piranhas. Needless to say, when the piranhas discover that the goldfish is actually food, they finished it off in less than 10 seconds, leaving only its head. People actually go through such extend and taped it down, deliberately.

Second link: After some duh feelings, I kind of enjoy this pornography clip. What is funny was the way the guy uses his heavily Russian-accented English to ask for sexual positions or commenting how good his companion skills were etc etc. Though it is staged, but it does inject some humour to the otherwise boring sex scenes.

Seriously, I wish I could provide the link here, just so you can see. But hor, cannot lah, wait people say I propagate violent and sex (didn’t I just did?).

Some encrypted message below, which I just have to get it out of my chest. So Enjoy!

Quoi qu'il en soit sur la question de se tapir, la sensation de I presque (avec certitude) toujours aiment mettre mes paumes dans le visage thingy quand j'agis l'un sur l'autre avec l'épouse de mon ami. Elle est lah gentil, mais le commentaire qu'elle a fait toujours pour m'inciter à me tapir. Par exemple, elle a commenté que le countertop noir de cuisine de couleur est mauvais, cos

La cuisine = a inévitablement laissé de la nourriture sur le supérieur = trop noir que un dessus ne peut pas voir, par conséquent oublié de essuyer = le jour suivant, sentira le mauvais et vous se demandant toujours ce qu'être ce pourrait.

Il est d'une manière flagrante stupide dans quelques beaucoup d'aspects, pour ne pas mentionner que comment osez nous laissons même le reste sur le dessus de cuisine, noircissent ou la couleur de lumière ne fait aucun différent ce qui. Elle n'est pas comme si le démuni de I a fait cuire avant.

I am really speechless.

But then again, that’s life. People do comes with idiosyncrasy and by understanding that in advance will probably solve most of life mundane problems.

I LIKE THE WAY YOU ARE; EVERY LINE, EVERY SCAR

16 July 2007
Humid Monday (33 Degree Celsius)
Night @ 2140 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 人质by 张惠妹
Mood: *La La La*

It happened again; someone pee like he has been having sex all weekend. Wau liew eh, simply cannot understand, the urinal SO BIG and WIDE, how can he missed it and drip all over the floor? We seriously need the “we aim to please” signboard.

Actually I aga aga know who haha. Minus those on Leave, went out for early lunch (like myself) and the women folks, I have narrow it down to one chap. But hor, he doesn’t look like the kind who has sex all weekend. I mean if it is Bird, we can understand and envy but him? Err, looks can be so deceiving. Nice, next time must ask him how he do it…

On another note, was reading some news lately and discover that some Punk has draw a similarity of the Pope (His Holiness Benedict XVI) and (of all people) Senator Palpatine (aka Emperor Darth Sidious I) of the Star War fame. Not to come across as being rude or otherwise, it is pretty funny. Consider the punk lucky; the most he can get is some flak from righteous media calling him inconsiderate and maybe, just maybe some damnation from Catholics at large, and that is all. Imagine if he did something to Islam… Fatwas, Death Threat, burn this, riot that. That’s why I say, lucky him.

I think they (Muslim) could do with some self control lah, cannot every thing not happy like morning-wake-up-no-erection then decides to seize the day and go on a rampage. Wait people like shallow bird assume that they are not really there for the religion how? Perhaps something like this metaphor:

A hunter goes to hunt bear (as obvious), saw one and begin shooting him. By cow luck, bear no die and mauled the hunter. Bear stop halfway and offer him a deal; bend over and get screwed or die. Hunter bends over and endures a long and humiliating screwing session.

Unhappy, he bought a more powerful rifle and goes back, seeking revenge. Saw bear, shoot and still bear no die… offer deal and he took the bending over again.

Bought another mega rifle and went back. Saw bear, shoot and yup, it just didn’t die.

Bear: Say dude, you are not really here for the hunt, right?

That’s why I shallow bird, everything also anyhow say one, don’t misquote me. Besides, I got no money for lawsuits. But seriously, if you want people to take you seriously (no pun) you should stop killing each other and the rest of the infidels which very much cover the likes of you and me. Come on, in the end, if you do manage to destroy humanity, there is still one left (you). So instead of becoming more MAD-readiness (Mutually Assured Destruction), do yourself a favour and enjoy life a bit lah. Don’t everything also beheading, bomb here bomb there. Tsk tsk, life already complicated enough.

That being said, irony and disturbing aside, I think life in their heaven (Islamic version) seems pretty interesting. Firstly, there are good foods, free flow of wines and Lo, also come with numerous wives that (according to some reports) wouldn’t complain how many times you have sex with and always miraculously (this is heaven we are talking, miracles happen) revert back to being a virgin.

Assuming that it is true (no one ever report back from there before), wouldn’t it a little oxymoron? Whatever you do now like suicide bombing for example, is just so that you can enjoy an infinite time of sex, liquor and virgin (assuming again that is important). It struck me as rather disturbing, I mean, why virginity would even be important (enough to be included in the heavenly mandate)? Don’t get me started on the infinite sexual penetrations and the subsequent complains of headaches…

Assuming also, that the Koran banned liquor, causal sex and polygamy for a reason, I think it pretty much sum up the misinterpretation according to individual needs. Read somewhere that there are no unifying authorities in issuing interpretation (known as Fatwas apparently). Meaning every one who identify as a Muslim and has some kind of authority over some people can and most probably will do it. Now that would be a shame, doesn’t it?

I happened to be in Istanbul recently and was touring their Grand Palace. Equally fascinating is the letters I chance upon in their museum. Apparently, it was sent in ancient time from their founder to its enemies (always kena besieged type). The actual content is a little blur but it somehow goes like this:

Yo my dearest Enemies, surrender and convert to my religion or
I shall smack you within an inch of your puny little life (plus those of your offspring)

Best, your fellow neighbour XXX

Now, that is not really helping, even in ancient time. Consider this scenario (my all time favourite) and you will know why

Some credits to them lah, after all, they did have a good civilisation and after the fall of the Roman Empire, they presided over a region of relative peace and prosperity while the rest of Europe burns under plague and civil wars (also coincidentally called the Dark Ages). Maybe this is the time their moderates should do something. Do not let the minority hijack whatever we hold universally dear to; freedom, democracy and our rights. Perhaps also, this little phase might help…

When the Nazis came for the Communist,
I remain silent, I was NOT a Communist

When they lock up the Social Democrats
I was silent, I was NOT a Social Democrats

When they came for the Trade Unionist
I did not speak up, I was NOT a Trade Unionist

When they came for me
There was no one left to speak out

Martin Niemoller (1892 – 1984)

Remember, No matter how insignificant you feel against the wider opinion, you do make a difference.

On a lighter note, I had fun chatting with a new friend. Haha.

离开我的时候是怎样的心情?

14 July 2007
Sunny Saturday (29 Degree Celsius)
Night @ 2340 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 听海 by 张惠妹
Mood: *La La La*

Surf aimlessly, reading blogs etc, left some comments here and there. Oh well. Maybe I should list down the blogs I frequent? Nah, some are not suitable for kids (in case any minors got here by mere bad luck) and beside, it is mostly Sweet Young Things haha. No Choice, weakness for them.

Now, I am aiming for my eventual retirement from my (cheebye) wonderful company soon. So what will happen after that? Well, I am thinking of picking up French from Alliance Francaise, maybe once a week kind of thing will be nice for a start but cannot spent too long unemployed lah, wait getting too used to lobo life how? Beside, it should be a good place to (pick up girls) know friends. For the love of the language, I can also get it done at the neighbourhood Community Center what… Hmm…

Therein lies my many dilemmas; at (cheebye) wonderful company, do (cheebye) wonderful job, get (cheebye) wonderful pay, at least for all the trouble, I got (cheebye) wonderful pay… Lobo at home, though no fucking things to worry about but no (cheebye) wonderful pay.

Cow, it is times like this that I fucking hate to think far…

Anyway, life’s a B.I.T.C.H, especially when stars don’t quite align. Speaking of which, I took a quick spin to downtown HSBC bank yesterday. After depositing my cheque, I came out just in time to see a parking attendant issuing a ticket to my car. Initially I was a little shock, cos it stated on the signboard that the parking is meant for driver like me (with the special license plate). But then, knowing how parking attendants work (it’s a Black by the way), she refuse to listen to me despite me being in my most polite tone AND she cheebye wave me off, in front of some many passerby (it is lunchtime). So in front of her, I calmly took the ticket and threw it into the bin. Shellshock for words and capitalising on my initiative, I reminded her that I have my “special” rights and basically told her to fuck off. I saw a few approving nods from the lunch crowds. Basket, I park at the correct lot and still want to fine me, just because she wears a uniform, she thinks she own the street? Not to come across as a bully, but there is nothing she can do about it (we are entitled to some special privileges). Stupid Parking Attendant, waste my breath for nothing.

That ended my otherwise uneventful Week.

听海 by 张惠妹

写信告诉我今天海是什么颜色
夜夜陪著你的海心情又如何
灰色是不想说蓝色是忧郁
而漂泊的你狂浪的心停在哪里

写信告诉我今夜你想要梦什么
梦里外的我是否都让你无从选择
我揪著一颗心整夜都闭不了眼睛
为何你明明动了情却不敢靠近

听海哭的声音叹惜著谁又被伤了心, 却还不清醒
一定不是我至少我很冷静
可是泪水就连泪水也都不相信

听海哭的声音这片海未免也太多情, 悲泣到天明
写封信给我就当最后约定
说你在离开我的时候是怎样的心情

NO APPROPRIATE TITLE FOR TODAY’S ENTRY LEH…

12 July 2007
Sunny Thursday (28 Degree Celsius)
Afternoon @ 1640 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: Auld Lang Syne
Mood: *Ok, so that is like what?*

Well, last evening had a small retirement ceremony for my boss; after serving a good 28 years in the Military. His farewell speech was pretty impromptu, just like the retirement ceremony (but its a surprise, so how prepared would you be?). It was supposed to be a surprise until as he decided to go home early, even before the ceremony commenced. Lucky he needed a lift from me, if not, die man, how to explain to everyone that “hey, the man of the hour has gone home, the joke is on us…” We even managed to convince the head of office building to give a small speech though it sounded pretty “Humour everyone” kind of speech but that ok. That’s life, haha.

My boss got into his speech talking mode for his farewell remarks, making funny comments; both sensible and wise. He is a good orator, I must say, not many people can do that with a certain flair and dignity. That is why also he is the supreme commander and I am only a flag aide… haha.

On a side note, his family & he bought me a farewell dinner on Monday. Had French, the usual fare. Nothing too fanciful but pretty expensive if you ask me. Still it is always a pleasure having a good dinner with someone dear.

I will miss him; he is the best boss I had and really do enjoy working with him. Despite him being a little forgetful and at times kind of lost like that, but that’s why he has us, to supply him with all the information he needed for whatever purpose; the ablest leader do not need to know the details, always the Big Picture. Well, it is kind of sad that he is leaving.

His farewell speech includes (with a pat on back); Good Bye Bird, my most Trusted Lieutenant …

Wau liew, in front of every one, with some pretty girls looking (and listening some more)… Why can’t he say ablest, smartest or simply most handsome… anyway, no fish, prawn also can. haha

He is a generous boss and a great friend. Since he is from the Navy, I shall add a little Navy-ness to my farewell post

It is an honour to serve under your command
Smooth Sails and Fair Winds, Always

Bird

Auld Lang Syne By Robert Burns (1759 – 1796)

Should Auld acquaintance be forgot
And never brought to mind?
Should Auld acquaintance be forgot
And Auld Lang Syne?

For Auld Lang Syne, my dear,
For Auld Lang Syne,
We’ll take a cup o’ kindness yet,
For Auld Lang Syne

IF I CAN’T HEAR YOUR HEARTBEAT, YOU ARE TOO FAR AWAY

10 July 2007
Thunderstorm Tuesday (36 Degree Celsius)
Night @ 2240 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 广岛之恋 by 莫文蔚 & 张洪量
Mood: *Ces’t La Vie*

It rained heavily today, trees toppled, drains flooded and people drenched. Sometime I wonder, what could be a better time? The rain does bring relief to the swelling heat and humidity but it does not comfort my hollow soul nor peace to my sanity. How strange…

I thought I can go on alone, which I could. Tough but still bearable. If I have not met you, would things turn out differently? I would hope so but you did give me hope; something to look forward to in the long cold nights. But I know these are not meant to be, just like everything else in life, all for the sake of self preservation.

After so many years, I still like this song.

It never fails to bring back memories, whichever that fits the present state. Alas but it should not be… for we should never be allowed to taste its nectar, lest we never return. We are but mere mortals, of sand and dust… how can we ever control our destiny?

I can’t even hear my own beat now, how so can I hear yours? You are that far away from me. Would you even stay for my sake? I know it is but a passing storm…

The future is bleak, but we can go to world’s end together, never to go through life alone again. Some time, things just don’t work this way, that’s life and I have known it better.

爱恨消失前用手温暖我的脸, 为我证明我曾真心爱过你

I miss you so much, bird…

广岛之恋 by 莫文蔚 & 张洪量

你早就该拒绝我, 不该放任我的追求
给我渴望的故事, 留下丢不掉的名字

时间难倒回空间易破碎, 二十四小时的爱情
是我一生难忘的美丽回忆

越过道德的边境, 我们走过爱的禁区
享受幸的错觉, 误解了快乐的意义

是谁太勇敢说喜欢离别, 只要今天不要明天眼睁睁看著
爱从指缝中溜走还说再见

不够时间好好来爱你, 早该停止风流的游戏
愿被你抛弃就算了解而分离
不愿爱的没有答案结局

不够时间好好来恨你, 终於明白恨人不容易
爱恨消失前用手温暖我的脸
为我证明我曾真心爱过你
爱过你爱过你爱过你

WHEN LIFE GIVE YOU SHIT, I LAN LAN ACCEPT IT

8 July 2007
Sunny Sunday (33 Degree Celsius)
Evening @ 1940 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 重逢 by 关淑怡
Mood: *Damn*

Sometime I really wonder why I always attract funny people and stuffs. One of my relative called all the way from home and asks for a loan. Not the first time, but I thought after getting his CPF money, he will be more prudent in his spending. But alas, it didn’t seem so…

I spend a ton for Europe trip, my home trip and also my parents’ trip to US and now, whatever leftover I spend some (a lot actually) on the stuffs I always wanted to buy. Not to mention I wrote off my kid brother bad debts and now, I barely scrapped through. In all, I spent nearly 25K within these couple of months. Why people love to trouble the already troubled mind?

Since I don’t have that much of money now, I shall let it be known to him; wait for my paycheck this weekend, if cannot wait, too bad. Why should I be worried for other people’s mistake and lack of planning? I so hate them.

The title says it all, when life give me shit, I lan lan accept it.

重逢 by 关淑怡

想走回过去的世界, 那里有你我不变的誓言
莫怪人世间多变, 只笑我太相信你给的诺言

终於习惯在黑夜, 才能够面对自己的伤悲
如今你的新世界, 她是否比我对你更好一些

谁都不算辜负谁, 只能说既然爱过就别后悔
如果能让你重新选择, 陪你到老的人
他会不会是我

曾经为你疯过为你错过, 为你淋湿在无人街头
我为你痛过为你哭过, 不管这世界怎黱笑我
我为你疯过为你逃过, 为你冲动的放弃所有
我这样问过, 是否只能默默的看你远走

TO PUNISH & TO ENSLAVE

7 July 2007
Very Sunny Saturday (36 Degree Celsius)
Afternoon @ 1310 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 暗示 by 李玟
Mood: *Woah, this is the Reason! *

WOAH!

This is the reason why Transformer the Movie (2007 Edition) is worth it; The Movie, my long time toys collection & the power. Yup, never fails to perk me up on a lazy Saturday morning. Unlike in Asia, it only premiere on 4 July 07. Whatever happened to good old premiere premiere in the US? So, if you have not seen it, go for it. That is why also Transformer is THE toy of the century, on my part that is.

Went to my first Karaoke Session last night. Cheebye, always when I am about to move on then got interesting thing, stay here for 3 fucking years cannot even find one. It is not that expensive (comparatively speaking) while the selection is Ok only. Nothing fanciful like those in Asia; Korean, Taiwanese & Singaporean type; now those are state of the Art. But it was fun, good old fun. Pity, no one sing duet with me. Suddenly I become the single Single in a group of couples, family and more couples. Maybe that is why I prefer to rot at home instead of going out? Haha, but if no go out, how to meet people? Errr…

Late evening went over to my boss’s housewarming. Bought a tiramisu, fruit tart cheesecake and a bouquet of flowers from Balducci’s. Man, those little buggers cost a bomb! But then, it’s for my boss, notwithstanding his excellent leadership, he also been very nice to me; remember the car loan. Ya lah, I am the type (to paraphrase a Chinese proverbs) Drink Water remember the source one. A little lazy to do it in better English but you get the gist. When you get older, this is what happened to life, you stop going to parties and just host little house gatherings. Better for the heart, lungs, liver (less alcohol) and everything else; it is plain old wholesome.

Similar to last weekly summary post; I haven’t seen you for a long time. Wonder how you are doing. Oh well, if there is a consolation, I find solace in my life, even though it is still empty, without you.

MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE (Happy 07 July 2007)

暗示 by 李玟

听见星星叹息, 用寂寞的语气
告诉不眠的云, 是否放弃日夜追寻风的动静

心事不停累积, 变成脸颊的泪滴
你始终没留意, 我特别在乎你
你却像风一样, 左顾右盼而行

全世界只有你不懂我爱你
我给的不只是好朋友而已
每个欲言又止浅浅笑容里
难道你没发现我渴望讯息

我应该如何让你知道我爱你
连星星都知道我心中秘密
今夜在你窗前下的一场雨
是我暗示你我有多麽委屈
你还不懂雨永远不会停...

ERR, HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY DUDES…

4 July 2007
Cloudy Wednesday (29 Degree Celsius)
Evening @ 1900 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: Star Spangled Banner!!
Mood: *Star & Stripes Forever*

4th of July, the time of the year for fireworks and a dose of good old patriotism. Unlike Singapore, people are allowed to do whatever they want with their flag (yup, even undergarments are not spared) but most just do with the usual display. Patriotism, democracy, freedom, all beautiful words, indescribable feelings, though now risks being hijacked by minorities who have all to lose and nothing to gain (except scratching their balls). Whatever I wanted to say have/had been describe in greater clarity and details by the press all over the world. It is indeed a sad day for everything that we believe in. Well, enough of this sadness, let’s eat, drink and be merry while the sun still shine.

On an unrelated note, must update my Running Mileage (as of 4th July 2007): 60km
A whooping 24km gain since 19 June. Ok, looks very much on track for 100km by mid August 07.

Yesterday I witness a real life encounter where a black (surprise surprise…) was blaspheming at an American Flag, shocking every lunch goers, but most did nothing. You see, he is at least 1.8m, mean muscles and look very much like one of the South East/West DC ghetto homies. How he got to affluent North West DC without being arrested remains a mystery but he was subsequently snatched into a black SUV by several secret service policemen. Along the way, he was being clubbed and hammered by the batons. Before he even reaches the waiting vehicle, he was so lifeless that the police had to drag his oversize hiphop pants by his Nike shoes. One Black American Pastor happened to be at the scene and immediate scream slogan of police brutality, in between calls for Bush Impeachment and banning homosexuality. He is nonetheless, Rev Al Sharpton, the New Yorker who always happened to be at most sensitive crime scene. The last I saw of him, several secret service chaps came running back for him. He took flight before being apprehended and again, hammered within an inch of his life. His last words (more of a whimper) were; I’ll call my lawyer, you white son of a bitch.

So much for a lazy afternoon lunch before 4th of July. In case you ask, yup that’s a joke. Nothing much to write mah… Might as well use some stereotyping and creativity to spice up the blog, haha.

I feel sorry for the revelers waiting for the 9pm fireworks at the mall. Seriously, minus the heavy thunderstorm now, this has got to be a hot and humid day. Poor thing, while they are drenched within an inch, I am seated comfortably in front of my desk, typing this out. My heart goes out to them, haha

Happy Independence Day, America!

Star-Spangled Banner by Francis Scott Key (1812)

O say, can you see, by the dawn’s early light,
What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming,
Whose broad stripes and bright stars, through the perilous fight

O’er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming?
And the rockets’ red glare, the bombs bursting in air
Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there;

O say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

Update: at 1935hrs – Fuck, rain stopped… thought it could be heavier haha

JUST LIKE YOGI BARRY USED TO SAY…

3 July 2007
Cloudy Tuesday (24 Degree Celsius)
Afternoon @ 1640 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 我要快乐by 张惠妹
Mood: *Cow Like What?*

Coincidentally, it seems we are having good old spring weather these days. It is around 18 in the morning to 26 on peak. Speaking of which, recently I have been cowpeh-ing my lack of golfing due to a wrist injury. It is time like this that I treasure health vs. other material things. Not that I am immobile by the wrist but it has been a source of my irritation since a month back. I thought I have recovered but during a practise swing last week, it somehow rekindles the inflammation and now, every morning I have to bear the discomfort of a strain wrist. That also, for some reason, injuries got worst during the night and peak at dawn, just after you wakes up, nasty little bugger.

Though not everything worsen during the night, for one, I think I look incredibly sexy in the morning; with my cigarette/hog breath, dynamite blown hair, haphazardly planted weed-like beard… Now, if that is not call sexy, I can’t tell what is. On that note, the only other human I think look incredibly good to the point of treason on morning is YL. On early hour of the morning, she still has the cutest appearance. That’s why; a beauty is a beauty is a… you get the message.

Just saw this documentary on Yogi Berra. Apparently he is a baseball player, still alive at 82 and his shot to fame? Beside baseball (he is quite a good player), he also founded Yogiism, a form of amusing speech error associated with Yogi Berra (who else).

Well, did a quick search and found these classic DUH quotes.

"This is like deja vu all over again."
"You can observe a lot just by watching."
"I want to thank you for making this day necessary." Yogi Berra on his Appreciation Day in St. Louis in 1947.
"Think! How the hell are you gonna think and hit at the same time?"
"You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there."
"I knew I was going to take the wrong train, so I left early."
"If you don't know where you are going, you will wind up somewhere else."
"If you can't imitate him, don't copy him."
"You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six."
"A nickel isn't worth a dime today."
"Nobody goes there anymore; it's too crowded."
"Do you mean now?" - When asked for the time.
"90% of the putts that are short don't go in."
"I made a wrong mistake."
"Thanks, you don't look so hot yourself." -- After being told he looked cool.
"I always thought that record would stand until it was broken."
"Yeah, but we're making great time!" -- In reply to "Hey Yogi, I think we're lost."
"Why buy good luggage? You only use it when you travel."
"The other teams could make trouble for us if they win."
"I never blame myself when I'm not hitting. I just blame the bat, and if it keeps up, I change bats. After all, if I know it isn't my fault that I'm not hitting, how can I get mad at myself?"
"The towels were so thick there I could hardly close my suitcase."
"You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."
"I didn't really say everything I said."

Well, like Yogi used to say; all the Fucking Obvious instead of the real thing.

I like that guy already but then Peanutz got my attention, all the time

又被爱伤了一遍, 无所谓当作成长

2 July 2007
Clear Sunday (27 Degree Celsius)
Evening @ 2240 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 我要快乐by 张惠妹
Mood: *Depressed*

This song reminds me of my holidays in Singapore recently. It brought back memories unique to that period of my life. So many songs remind me of distinctive memories, memories that are dear to me. What if I lose all of it? Would I still be the same bird?

And yes, so it seems, I am under a little depression now. It could be hormonal, situational and even psychological but those are not really important. Rather, nothing is at stake, just plain old depression.

I missed someone or something that I couldn’t put a name to it. That would be problematic if not for the fact that I couldn’t care less. Everything happened for a reason and we can only understand it on hindsight, which is why the saying goes; Hindsight is always 6/6.

It is not that I am under tremendous stress or workload but somehow, for some reason, I couldn’t find happiness in everything that I do, planning to do and even thinking about it. 3 years gone, like a passing shower, it brought neither clarity nor comfort to where I am now. I tried, of course, to be optimistic but still, here I am, without anything and starting over again. I dreaded everything that lies before me, I guess one thing I have learnt; I have nothing and no one to fall back to, it is just me against the whole wide world.

As much as I tried to reason and finding ways to justify my existence, I couldn’t. That is a shame and a tragedy on my part. Who can I blame but myself.

I am tired, I seriously am.

我要快乐 by 张惠妹

又被爱伤了一遍, 无所谓当作成长
刚刚走开的人, 烟还点着味道却淡了
我并不是天生爱寂寞, 却比任何人都多
就算把世界给我, 我还是一无所有

我要快乐我要能睡的安稳,
有些人不抱了才温暖, 离开了才不恨我早应该割舍

我要快乐哪怕笑的再大声
心不是热的全都是假的, 只有眼泪是真的

把从前想了一遍, 谢谢了伤我的人
想做乐观的人, 每种雨声听了都不冷
我并不是天生爱寂寞, 却比任何人都多
就算把世界给我, 我还是一无所有

IT IS SIMPLE AND BRUTAL; A PERSON CAN GET USED TO ANYTHING, INCLUDING LONELINESS

30 June 2007
Cloudy Saturday (32 Degree Celsius)
Evening @ 2140 (Washington DC Time)
Listen: 爱那么重 by 巫启贤
Mood: *Stay Stay*

Woke up at 4.30am to go cycling again, this time at Alexandria (last week was the National Mall). This time round, more adventurous, more confident and more garang, in all, went about 8 miles (13km) trail. Also, with more confidence came more injuries. Fell off the bike twice, not sure whose fault was the first but the second was mine entirely. The details are best left vague but the lesson learn from this is; buy a small side (rear) mirror for my helmet. Not those Auntie/Uncle type you mount on the bike handle but those tiny little surgeon’s type mirror you fixed onto your helmet. Yup, those.

Read this article a couple of weeks back about cycling, something like if you can’t go fast (like 99% of the cyclist) then at least look fast. I don’t know much about Going Fast, one thing for sure, Looking Fast comes with wearing tights and oxygen depriving suits, totally not my cup of tea.

Had a weird dream the other day; dreamt that I did some really weird (lacking of a better vocabulary) with some colleagues and some dogs (not Animal Love you perverts). Think cooking them… Must be the conversation I had with Ms C lah, tell me all about her dog while she happily tucking in her dinner of Curry Chicken. Must make a mental note to stay away from her and the curry, haha.

Then came a classic case of blatantly corny joke (if that’s a joke at all). I was driving my Boss to a retirement ceremony one lunch day when we stop by a traffic junction. A car came along and my boss commented with great astonishment; Eh, how come no one inside?

On closer examination, we didn’t see anyone in it until the driver started chatting on his cell. Apparently, he is a black (what else) and he is so well concealed inside his tinted window that the only thing that gave him away was his teeth. Now you know why Darkie toothpaste change to Darlie and blacks make good advertisement for toothpaste (think contrast). Now you also know how racist we all are, not entirely our fault though.

But I shan’t have too much hope… You know how hopes could get you; more hope equates to more disappointment.

爱那么重 by 巫启贤

该不会就此结束 就此分手, 爱却分明还没到尽头
会不会难以割舍 欲走还留, 我们已坚持太久

是否你没有把握 而有所保留, 我却为你放弃了自我
是否我给你太快 给你太多, 心甘情愿犯下的错

爱那么重 爱那么痛, 给我再多勇气也没有用
对你再坏 对你再好, 这一切再也不能阻止你逃

爱那么重 爱那么痛, 给我再多承诺也只是空
如果太苦 把我忘掉, 一颗心只求你曾真的明了

情再深 也不能改变些什么, 情再浓 也不能解开这爱的枷锁