Sunday, November 22, 2009

QUE SARA, SARA (WHATEVER WILL BE, WILL BE)

22 November 2008
Sunny Sunday (27 Degree Celsius)
Morning @ 0900 (Singapore Time)
Listen: 世界唯一的你 by 曹格
Mood: *Paddling in the pool”

Rainy season (we actually have seasons!) gets on slightly earlier than usual. Flash flood hit Bukit Timah and it was so bad that, according to the government, it is one of those once-in-50-years type. Right, and since they know it is 50-years-type thingy, why then does PUB and LTA shake leg eat snake every day? Either way, lucky for me, I was away for reservist call up. So for obvious reason, I missed Bukit Timah area by a mile… Yes, Lucky me.

On the Reservist note, I was practically Lobo-ing for the longest time in my life. I should have just slept through, but knowing how the CB officers and specialists work, I shan’t, lest I got sabo and kena blanket party. Yup, at our age somemore. You can’t really mature a man, any man…

Went to my buddy wedding dinner last night. It was ok, nothing fanciful, a simple dinner of warmth and blessing. Finally, after being together for the longest time (think 15 years), they finally tied the knot. However, everything that prelude (before and after) the wedding sucks. Firstly, the carpark(s) are full. The entire vicinity carpark are full. FULL! One joker security guard (managing traffic cos everywhere is packed, yet surprisingly orderly…) suggest parking at St. James. DUDE, DO YOU have any idea HOW FAR ST JAMES IS TO DINNER? Told you that guy is a joker… Wanted to park at double-yellow road just off the street but got CB traffic warden and then it will also set me back by 70 bucks… Ok, then Bright idea came along, the Coach parking area. That’s my next set of dilemma, I was told it will be expensive (thanks Guy for telling me, AFTER I parked…) but I didn’t know it will be THAT expensive. For a 3 hour parking, my cash card is S$20.40 poorer. Lucky for me again, cash card got money. Damn…

Then I have my own sets of problem. After 31 years of existence, I came to the realization my flaws, weakness and strength, many of which will remain anonymous; one thing for sure, I’m not good with spoken words. Alas, the agony (what agony?) haha… ANYWAY…

Once or twice or… for the longest time, many years ago, I was troubled by love, career and everything that life throws at me. I fell in and out of depression; it got especially bad when I was in the States. Everything smells, look and taste grey and gloomy. But it did serve to create this greater awareness of my inner self (albeit a whole spectrum of Blue-ness) and the needed strength to overcome greater adversities. Like I said earlier, I am in happiness now. Never had I been in such calmness and blissfully loving life for like ever. Such bliss comes at a price; I lost the will to write those heart wrenching entries and to overcome my limitation… and that is a problem? Why yes…

Take Marathon or long distance running for example. During my remedial training in the army, somehow, I can’t find the needed boost to spur me on. It was a puzzling time; I cannot understand the rationale and for that 1 minute, my brain literally on overdrive, trying to come to terms with my apparent disability. Then it dawn me… I am older (by a decade) and happier (much of my existence with my wife). Ah, that explains everything. Happy man how to torture oneself? Why, even to begin…

I lost my sense of writing in the process too.

Nevertheless, it is all good. I will however, visit it time and again, of my depression and all the sadness. I will never leave them behind. They are my precious…. My little precious

Right, Moving on…I’m going for a healthier me. That includes Jogging 3 times a week, or make that twice, golfing, and perhaps Gym… And no swimming? Well, put it this way, if swimming is good for our figure, explain whales to me.

Then again, there are whole lots of other land based creature, like big fat fugly Woodstock… Watch this space! Oh yes, Mom & Dad Loves you, our little Woodstock/snoopy Junior.

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